Working from 4:30 until 9:30 tonight but I’ll probably stay until 10:00 — if Dallas is in a good mood.
I could use the money.
So, I was supposed to go see Dustin tomorrow after working 12:00-2:00.
All I had to do was get Ashley, the girl I always take shifts for whenever she decides she doesn’t want to work because she’s “too emotionally tired,” to take my shift from 4:30-9:00.
She said no.
This means I get to work all day tomorrow, and wait till next Saturday to see Dustin.
We were rather busy at work.
It was just Brad, Derek, Mark, and I. No Future Husband, sadly.
Brad is always nice to talk to though.
He is leaving soon… Put in his resignation because my family members are infamous now for being judgmental and unfair, and he couldn’t take it anymore.
He’s been working there since I was about 10 years old.
“If you ever need anything, don’t hesitate to call me, shortay.”
As they say… People come and go.
Going to go take a bath.
I smell like stale cigarettes, and mother won’t have that.
Working at 5:00 with Dallas and Josh.
Hopefully they’re in good moods, or all I’ll be able to focus on is school tomorrow and Bradley.
Lovely is going to kill me, or adore me more… Not sure.
*lights incense and sets it next to my bed*
Axel rubbed my back until I was close to falling asleep, eyes heavy.
Before that we were lying outside on a blanket, listening to music and talking about … the boy that doesn’t have a nickname yet. Lovely knows.
He was nice enough to buy me a pack of Marb Reds.
I open by myself at work tomorrow 11:00-3:00, then 5:00-8:00.
I’m tired, so I guess it’s time to sleep.
A girl at work can’t come in to work her shift from 5-8pm so I am taking it. Along with working all day tomorrow, Monday night, and Thursday night.
My paycheck is going to be amazing.
Finished Mockingjay. Half way through Girl, Interrupted.
I can’t wait to see Dallas.
Though I have this small fear that for some reason he won’t be there.
Tonight I simply fell into a deep depression, and that is where I sit.
He made that kiss-face. He winked at me. He was Dallas. Handsome, funny, smart Dallas. And it’s terrible.
Josh said that if Dallas wasn’t dating Dedra that he thinks he would date me. I laughed.
No room for giving hope to such foolish things; bound to fail and disappoint.
Though Dallas asked me why I stopped responding to his texts early today at school… Why does he care if I respond?
I don’t want to care about things that wont happen, but I found myself thinking about the possibility tonight. I know he and Dedra will break up, though mother says they are the kind of people that will end up together anyway. I have small fleeting wishes that he would like me, in that way. So would I take the chance, even if it meant the inevitable?
I think so. It would be worth the experience. The moments of euphoria when it was just him and I.
I need to stop.
God,I’mlonely and Dallas isstuck in my mind.
Today has been better. Dallas did a too-serious-kiss-face towards me tonight. Oof… Hopefully going to smoke out of a gas mask tonight with Sam and my step cousin soon.
Then going to Ryan’s house to stay the night.
Then I get to see my doctor tomorrow (he is hot in an older British guy kind of way). Hopefully nothing is wrong with me.
Then Tuesday I start at the IDEA Charter school.
Bath time, then work. I get to spend time with a bunch of hung over people! yay.