Perhaps you might be wondering why I sent you this.
It’s for two reasons. The first one is because I really miss you. And the second one is because I think I never told you how much I appreciate everything you did for me. The mere fact of being there for me when I need to talk to someone was just enough for me.
It’s been more than a year since we met. And I must admit I never thought to meet someone as awesome as you in my entire life. No matter what you were always there in the good and bad times and you can be sure I will never forget that.
I want to apologize as well because I feel that I wasn’t good enough to help you when you felt bad or sad about something. I have to say I’ve always been a cold-hearted person (and I think you know that) but I always wanted to try to help you even a little bit but I never knew exactly how to do it and I think I failed every single time I tried. I’m really sorry for that. I would’ve wanted to be more helpful.
There’s something I think about all the time and that I will never forget.
When I was in the hospital due that fencing accident some time ago I remember when that doctor told me “You said “Rebecca” right before enter the surgery room. Who’s Rebecca?”
At first I didn’t knew exactly why I said your name. But I think now I can understand everything. It was because you were the first person I really trusted in and the first one I really loved and cared for.
But… How could this be possible? I mean… we only know each other over the internet. That’s insane!
For most people it might be insane, indeed.
As for me, I think the distance have never been a barrier for us. Even when we’ve never met for real my mind will never change. You will always be that fascinating girl who came to change my life.
And why I say you changed my life? That’s easy…
Because you did! I wanted to protect you, I wanted to make you feel loved, I wanted to make you smile once in a while… even when we were separated by a lot of miles away I cared about you and I worried a lot about you. Even now, I do it every day. And that will never change. When I thought I was a cold-hearted person you arrived and I figured out I wasn’t that cold at all. To the contrary, I really cared and wanted to protect the ones I love. And you were and always will be the first one.
I remember when sometimes you told me you were feeling sad, or you were crying… I felt bad for two reasons. The first one was because I hate when you don’t feel alright. And the second one is because I couldn’t do anything to make you feel better.
I’ve told you this a lot of times before…
You are an awesome girl. No matter what other people think about you.
You are smart, talented, beautiful, amazing, fascinating, interesting… and the list can go on.
I wish you only the best because you really deserve it.
And don’t dare to deny anything of what I’ve said! =)
I know I’m not a good writer. But I wanted to give a try at writing something for you.
Anyway, I think I’ll finish this letter here.
Remember, no matter what, there’s always someone thinking about you somewhere in the world. And that’s me. You can be sure you’ll never be alone. I assure you that. Whenever you need someone you know you can count on me, okay? I will always be here for you.
I love you, Rebecca. Please take care of yourself, dear.